We always want MORE

It's the disease of our lives, we always want more, we don't stop and look around and try to be happy. We compare ourselves with others, we want what they have. Not only tangibles but also intangibles. We want a thinner body, longer hair, coloured eyes (if yours are brown). Think about a second where you were actually happy with everything you have. mmmmm so long ago? Yeah probably when it was when you were a child but even then you were jealous of a nicer toy that your friend had or the bigger room he/she had. But back then they were temporary feeling you knew you couldn't do anything about it so you were pretty chilled and you were happy with the things your parents have provided. When did we stop being happy?
We can go all the way back to the invention of money maybe but what's the point of blaming Lydians. The dynamics of modern society are so different now we either fit in or stand out. But even the way we stand out is with a group. We want to be a part of a group, then we want to be a part of another group yet again we want more.
In todays market where almost any good is reachable we seek to have them all until we get tired. When we are young we have to find a job, earn money fit in/ stand out, find our personality... And there goes the youth then maybe you get married maybe you don't maybe you have kids maybe you don't but always want more and more, never stop asking. And IF you stop asking one day, you realise that you don't have the strength to realise what you wanted to realise, you didn't enjoy life as much as you could have. But on the other hand in this money driven society if you didn't ask for more you would be broke and yet again you wouldn't have realised most of your dreams but maybe you would have been happier and you would enjoy the life more. So the question is when is the right time to say enough and stop wanting more?

The Answer; NO

Where I grew up we never accepted an answer “no”. I’m not joking!!As a nation I must say it’s in our blood. We always want to get what we want. Take the simplest example. Imagine you go this popular place on a friday night without reservation, the chances for you to find a table is 98%. You go up to the waiter and ask for a table. The answer, you already know “Sorry, there are no tables available”. First thing you say “Aaaa really BUT we are only 2 can’t you do something?” by using all your charms. If he says “No, I’m sorry there is a waiting list if you want I can write your name down.” First you get excited tell your name and then ask “How long do we have to wait?” If it’s longer than 30min, you play the role of little starving person “But we are super hungry can’t we make it a bit faster?” of course with a huge smile on your face. (At this moment I really don’t know what we expect because you are in a restaurant 90% of people who are there are hungry, secondly there are people who have been waiting why do you want to be irrespecutful, lastly what do you expect waiter do to - take the dishes away from people who already eat/drink and chou them away so you can sit?-). To be fair sometimes this cuteness works and you cut the line and have table rather quickly but for the times that it doesn’t work, you wait in the bar and again most probably get drunk with that empty stomach and eat the whole menu. To be honest this is the best scenario of not accepting the answer “no”. It happens in the shops as well, you try a shoe and if doesn’t fit you ask for smaller/bigger number when the answer is no, you ask again really? when they say sorry you stand up and ask them to check other stores if there aren’t in those stores you start mumbling making threats of not coming to the store again(if you really like to shoe)… For me this was super normal until when I hit the road on my own for a summer school in Paris at the age of 16. There no was no and I didn’t have my parents to make it a yes for me. As I grew up older and went to an exchange I was shocked, I was going to restaurants without reservation I was being super cute when I ask for tables but the answer was no and no one was having any privileges; either you wait or you go, your choice. In my case I never gave up giving this attitude of not accepting the answer “no”. Now in Italy it’s the same sometimes the cuteness works sometimes it doesn’t. So I started wondering whether this attitude was my characteristic or seriously something related to my nationality? Regarding all the times I lived (and still living) abroad, I met many people from different countries as a human nature we don’t accept the answer “no”. For some small things like a table in a resto or a different size of skirt is just the smallest part. Sometimes we can't accept the things that life bring to us. We can’t accept of being rejected after a job interview, the answer “no” lowers our self-esteem deep inside, if a boy/girl says “no” to a date night most of the time we want to crawl in our beds with all the junk food in the world. All these made me questioning when did we become this demanding? And then I imagine a world without an answer “no”, everything I ask for I  have. To be honest it’s super good but after a point it would be super boring: I would be left without ambition, without any goals and dreams. After all maybe it’s good to have an answer “no” for some cases in order to find another way around to realise some stuff…NO?

Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost…Really?

Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost…Really? 

this was my favourite phrase of all times. in fact I had it tattooed. but now I’m I’m wondering at some point even Wendy felt lost in Wonderland so until when can we keep up with this wandering? Yes the world is a huge playground and yes you have to do things that scare you, be open to new things etc. But all these things stop when you hit a bumpy road and you want to  just crawl next to the person you feel the safest. but many times if you are a wanderer that person is miles away and you are far away of that warm cuddle of the loved one. Okey okey it makes you stronger and you know better how to handle the difficulties as you get older aka you get wiser. but when you’ll be wise enough to protect yourself form the things that makes you unhappy. hmmm probably never? I can see still my mum getting upset for a small thing. While wondering my next move trying to figure out where I’ll end up everyone says it’s ok to get lost you’ll find smth. So until when do I have to wander and find that thing? I think it goes beyond of finding something what you it’s about wanting to be found. As we wander letting people in our lives, letting go some of them(although sometimes it’s really hard) we wait for this one person or one thing to come and help us to identify ourselves. apparently it’s harder to find that one thing a desire, a talent, a will is rather hard to find on our own expect some lucky people… it sounds a little pessimistic but though life eh? so we full fill our lives while waiting for that one magical thing to happen. Till it happens I’ll continue this blog so see you around!